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Order of the Kitteh
callmesabrina
Posts: 71,122
Registered: ‎04-30-2007

Irrational fears pt.5: Butterfingers.

[ Edited ]

Statement:
Fingers are porous and absorbant. FACT!
Butter is fat. FACT!
Mooshing butter into delicious recipies with your bare hands will make you have fatter fingers. FACT!

Ahem:

Today I would like to talk about a very serious condition that, believe it or not, millions of people around the world are not even aware of.

This condition has an original name, that I came up with, that doesn't mean something else other than this condition.

That's right, you guessed it, I'm talking about Butterfingers.

We, as people that cook with butter, need to know the dangers we face every time we are near butter.

We need to spread this awareness to everyone we know. And be careful where we spread our butter.

Spreading Awareness Starts With You Me Warcry Here:

Our very dear friend, warcryofthecrazy, discovered this condition at a very young age.

She used to help her mother bake, mooshing the butter into the rest of the recipe with her hands.
warcry knew how absorbant skin is, but her love for her mother kept her going.

As time went by the realization was so inflated in her mind, her worries consumed her. She started to notice changes in her fingers.

Were they really getting bigger? Was it the begining stages of Butterfingers?

I'm not a doctor. But I'm sure it probably, most definately, certainly... without a doubt was.

This needs to stop. Its not fair.

 

It could happen to anyone, even you.

I never knew!!! I never knew about Butterfingers.

Not only has warcry saved my fingers, she may, very well have saved my life.

When Does It Stop?:

The worst part about all of this is, it doesn't stop at fingers.

Next time you have a sleepover with your friends, how about you have a pillow fight, okay?

No more butter fights guys.

No more butter facials. That's not moisturizer, that's just making your face fat.

What's a chubby? I'm not a man so I don't know. But I think I just figured it out.

That must be how a man gets a chubby.

Butter? In your pants? Come on guys.

 

Where Does The Madness Stop?:

Where does the madness stop?

Whatever, you can keep putting butter in ur pants if you like it so much.

But butter everywhere else is not okay.

The Lesson:

I hope you've learned something today.

I know I have. Not the thing about Butterfingers, the other thing.

So if you're a female, you've probably learned 2 lessons today. You're welcome.

 

Anyways.

Next time you need to touch butter, don't.
And if you still need to, even after you decided not to, well, wear gloves.
Just use comon sense when you're around butter folks. That's all it takes.
And most importantly, tell your friends, they deserve to know about science. We all do.

 

Friends don't let other friends get Butterfingers.





 

clock is ticking.

our side of the fence, our side of the fence, our side of the fence,
are you on?
Order of the Kitteh
Curlymafurly
Posts: 52,818
Registered: ‎10-15-2010
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Re: Irrational fears pt.5: Butterfingers.

Reply to callmesabrina - Message ID#: 59490012

The formentioned statement was a trifle too excelled in length and, as such, I am afraid to admit that I refrained from aquiring the knowledge held within.

I Heart Fred Sanford

King of the Jesse Cox, Yogscast, and Totalbiscuit Fan Club [IB Chapter]
ALL HAIL THE GREAT SPACE BUTTERFLY

polexia said she'd make the sacrifice for mankind and be my valentine! =D ♥

Owl #336 :smileytongue:
Kittehuminati
Tetsusaiga_775
Posts: 143,292
Registered: ‎09-17-2004
0

Re: Irrational fears pt.5: Butterfingers.

Reply to callmesabrina - Message ID#: 59490012

You're such a wuss. :smileyvery-happy:
I was born to be a fiddler in a old time string band.
Order of the Kitteh
callmesabrina
Posts: 71,122
Registered: ‎04-30-2007

Re: Irrational fears pt.5: Butterfingers.

[ Edited ]

Reply to Curlymafurly - Message ID#: 59490046

You're the one missing out. :smileysad:

This is serious stuff.

IM CONCERNED ABOUT UR SAFETY!

clock is ticking.

our side of the fence, our side of the fence, our side of the fence,
are you on?
Kittehuminati
lilshonenbat
Posts: 104,143
Registered: ‎08-02-2005
0

Re: Irrational fears pt.5: Butterfingers.

Reply to callmesabrina - Message ID#: 59490012

I'm going to call you my Butterfinger.

Because while I'm around, nobody better lay a finger on you. :smileymad:
Order of the Kitteh
callmesabrina
Posts: 71,122
Registered: ‎04-30-2007
0

Re: Irrational fears pt.5: Butterfingers.

Reply to Tetsusaiga_775 - Message ID#: 59490080

I'm not a wuss.
I am very concerned about the safety of IBers and want to spread awareness about the scary things in life.
Many things they've never even knew or thought about.
clock is ticking.

our side of the fence, our side of the fence, our side of the fence,
are you on?
Order of the Kitteh
callmesabrina
Posts: 71,122
Registered: ‎04-30-2007

Re: Irrational fears pt.5: Butterfingers.

Reply to lilshonenbat - Message ID#: 59490146

That made me giggle... >_>
Will you be my shield if a butter fight were to break out?!

D=
clock is ticking.

our side of the fence, our side of the fence, our side of the fence,
are you on?
Kittehuminati
Tetsusaiga_775
Posts: 143,292
Registered: ‎09-17-2004
0

Re: Irrational fears pt.5: Butterfingers.

Reply to callmesabrina - Message ID#: 59490192

What fun is life if you're going to be a wuss your entire life?
I was born to be a fiddler in a old time string band.
Kittehuminati
lilshonenbat
Posts: 104,143
Registered: ‎08-02-2005
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Re: Irrational fears pt.5: Butterfingers.

Reply to callmesabrina - Message ID#: 59490270

Well, that'd be one slippery situation, but I can guarantee you anyone who tried to oppose me would be toast.

































Butter and toast humor. :\
KittehLegend
GeminiShamrock
Posts: 20,444
Registered: ‎04-11-2005
0

Re: Irrational fears pt.5: Butterfingers.

Reply to callmesabrina - Message ID#: 59490012

Nobody better lay a finger on my Butterfinger? *shrugs*

Gallifrey Falls No More
"People assume that time is a strict progression of cause to effect, but actually — from a non-linear, non-subjective viewpoint — it's more like a big ball of wibbly-wobbly... timey-wimey... stuff." - The Tenth Doctor.
Entrance theme (if I were a wrestler): "Speak" by Queensrÿche.
Jeff Murdock, aka "Moparman" and "The-Green-Hornet" (1986-2013)
"Goodnight, sweet prince. And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest." - Horatio (to Hamlet, from Hamlet, written by William Shakespeare.)
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callmesabrina
Posts: 71,122
Registered: ‎04-30-2007
0

Re: Irrational fears pt.5: Butterfingers.

Reply to Tetsusaiga_775 - Message ID#: 59490300

im not a wuss :smileysad:

im spreading awarness!

... stop yelling at me... ;_;


clock is ticking.

our side of the fence, our side of the fence, our side of the fence,
are you on?
Kittehuminati
Tetsusaiga_775
Posts: 143,292
Registered: ‎09-17-2004
0

Re: Irrational fears pt.5: Butterfingers.

Reply to callmesabrina - Message ID#: 59490450

W-U-S-S-Y.

>_>
I was born to be a fiddler in a old time string band.
Order of the Kitteh
callmesabrina
Posts: 71,122
Registered: ‎04-30-2007
0

Re: Irrational fears pt.5: Butterfingers.

Reply to lilshonenbat - Message ID#: 59490342

is good humor..

you can be mah hero.
its settled. >_>
clock is ticking.

our side of the fence, our side of the fence, our side of the fence,
are you on?
Order of the Kitteh
callmesabrina
Posts: 71,122
Registered: ‎04-30-2007
0

Re: Irrational fears pt.5: Butterfingers.

Reply to GeminiShamrock - Message ID#: 59490412

booooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

GET OFF THE STAAAAAAAAAAAGE
clock is ticking.

our side of the fence, our side of the fence, our side of the fence,
are you on?
Kittehuminati
lilshonenbat
Posts: 104,143
Registered: ‎08-02-2005
0

Re: Irrational fears pt.5: Butterfingers.

Reply to callmesabrina - Message ID#: 59490476

Yea! I'm a hero. This night is kicking ass all over the place.
KittehLegend
GeminiShamrock
Posts: 20,444
Registered: ‎04-11-2005
0

Re: Irrational fears pt.5: Butterfingers.

Reply to callmesabrina - Message ID#: 59490498

Bu--bu--I love you.


:smileysad:

Gallifrey Falls No More
"People assume that time is a strict progression of cause to effect, but actually — from a non-linear, non-subjective viewpoint — it's more like a big ball of wibbly-wobbly... timey-wimey... stuff." - The Tenth Doctor.
Entrance theme (if I were a wrestler): "Speak" by Queensrÿche.
Jeff Murdock, aka "Moparman" and "The-Green-Hornet" (1986-2013)
"Goodnight, sweet prince. And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest." - Horatio (to Hamlet, from Hamlet, written by William Shakespeare.)
Order of the Kitteh
callmesabrina
Posts: 71,122
Registered: ‎04-30-2007

Re: Irrational fears pt.5: Butterfingers.

Reply to Tetsusaiga_775 - Message ID#: 59490468

ur just a bully :*(
clock is ticking.

our side of the fence, our side of the fence, our side of the fence,
are you on?
Kittehmortal
d_st_rb_d
Posts: 30,420
Registered: ‎09-23-2004

Re: Irrational fears pt.5: Butterfingers.

Reply to callmesabrina - Message ID#: 59490012

*floats*
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
mÙÙÙÙÙ
SSSSSSSSS~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Awesome Kitteh
warcryofthecrazy
Posts: 11,446
Registered: ‎03-06-2004
0

Re: Irrational fears pt.5: Butterfingers.

Reply to callmesabrina - Message ID#: 59490012

OMG YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY THE BEST WOMEN EVER !!!
THANK YOU this is too funny
side quest's are the foreplay in life.
King Of Kittehs
farnsworth2
Posts: 151,184
Registered: ‎05-26-2006
0

Re: Irrational fears pt.5: Butterfingers.

Reply to callmesabrina - Message ID#: 59490012

>__> im afraid of the candy butter fingers

Attitude? [√]
Style? [√]
Privilege?[√]
Kittehuminati
Tetsusaiga_775
Posts: 143,292
Registered: ‎09-17-2004
0

Re: Irrational fears pt.5: Butterfingers.

Reply to callmesabrina - Message ID#: 59491386

YEAH WELL.

GROW A PAIR.
I was born to be a fiddler in a old time string band.
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inhumanrampager
Posts: 54,968
Registered: ‎02-02-2007
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Re: Irrational fears pt.5: Butterfingers.

Reply to callmesabrina - Message ID#: 59490012

Butter in my pants? Genius.....
You sent that Boba Fett?? Awesome!! -- if not GTFO :robotmad:
An admin violated my signature. Multiple times, :womansad:

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callmesabrina
Posts: 71,122
Registered: ‎04-30-2007
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Re: Irrational fears pt.5: Butterfingers.

Reply to warcryofthecrazy - Message ID#: 59519644

I'm glad you recovered from this horrible disease before it was too late *hugs*

>_>
clock is ticking.

our side of the fence, our side of the fence, our side of the fence,
are you on?
Order of the Kitteh
callmesabrina
Posts: 71,122
Registered: ‎04-30-2007
0

Re: Irrational fears pt.5: Butterfingers.

Reply to farnsworth2 - Message ID#: 59519716

if youre naughty...
I will dump them all over you while you sleep <_<
tell me more of your fears and secrets deary >_>
clock is ticking.

our side of the fence, our side of the fence, our side of the fence,
are you on?
Order of the Kitteh
callmesabrina
Posts: 71,122
Registered: ‎04-30-2007
0

Re: Irrational fears pt.5: Butterfingers.

Reply to Tetsusaiga_775 - Message ID#: 59520534

my chesticles are still growing.
clock is ticking.

our side of the fence, our side of the fence, our side of the fence,
are you on?