Sealab 2021

[Iandstander]

Notice the glaring lack of information.  It's cause everyone's being a bunch of mailboxheads and not contributing.
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[Iandstander]

  Captain Hank "Hazel" Murphy

Captain of Sealab AKA "Skip" First Episode Appearance:  "Radio Free Sealab" Last Episode Appearance:  "Tornado Shanks" where he is sent off to go fight the Spice Wars.  Harry Goz, his VA, had recently passed away. Voiced by:  Harry Goz (rest in peace) Has Slept with Debbie Dupree.  Mustache was on.

Captain murphy is a 54 year old 5'10" example of what captaining an underwater sealab requires.  We first caught a glimpse of his talent in the episode "Radio Free Sealab", where he creates an underground (or underwater, if you would), pirate radio station, and this is where we begin to see what would lead to two and a half seasons of leadership exceeded only by his utter disregard for anything leadershippy.  His attention is easily grabbed by anything, whether it's a creature called 'squishface' or a persistant desire to validate the robot body debate, and once he's set his mind to something, he's not likely to let it go, and despite seeming apparently dimwitted, he comes up with the most clever and ingenuitive ways to accomplish his goals.  

Weighing in at 155 lbs, he has an inexplicable love for a device called the "happycake oven", and has sent his crew out on a suicide mission before to retrieve it.  His emotional state is wavering, constantly between a haunting sense of calm and total emotional outburst, and in no time at all he can go from incorrect change with a vending machine to 

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shedding tears over the death of a scorpion who only seconds prior had been poisoning his trapped body with its venom.

Murphy has also got quite the wit, and with little or no effort spits out some of the harshest yet most poignent one liners.  He frequently exploits the crews talents.  Examples are Sparks, who he uses as sort of an operational liaison to the world, unknowingly, or possibly apathetically, missing Sparks' desire for pyramid schemes or world domination or whatever.  Quinn's scientific capacity is also hammered on a lot.  He doesn't think much of pod 6, either, which is where the long running joke on the ASMB where babbling is "Pod 6".  This is because of the preponderance of posters who post primarily outside of babbling who consider it 'where jerks hang out, ergo...pod 6'...in a loving manner of course, meant in no way as a serious slight.  Jerks.    

  Captain Murphy went away to fight the great spice wars in the middle of season 3.  There's speculation as to why he made this decision, leaving the crew in the arguably less capable hands of Captain Shanks, but in reality it's because Harry Goz, the voice actor, passed away from multiple mylenoma on September 6, 2003.  

 Excellent Quotes:

 "There go my nipples again"

"You hear that Stormy?  Die."

"I hate pod six.  I don't even know why we have a pod 6.  total suck pod"

"Pudding can't fill the emptiness inside me!  but it'll help..."

"Everybody shutup!  Now where did you get those cool hats?"

"It's not a toy!  It makes real cupcakes with a 40 watt bulb.  And it has icing packets, but the secret ingredient...is love...dammit."

"It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain"

"I bet your lymph nodes are as big as cats!"

"What in Judas rockin' Priest is goin' on around here?"

(to Quinn) "I'm about to infect you with the back of my hand!"

"Hey Frank Lloyd Wrong! Nice design, idiot!"

"There can be only none!"

"Snitchin' is bitchin'!"

[Iandstander]

 Captain Bellerophon "Tornado" Shanks

Captain of Sealab First Episode Appearance:  "Tornado Shanks" Voiced by: Harry Goz's Son, Michael Goz Former Football Coach

Captain Shanks is usually considered the second captain of sealab, whereas Murphy always held a special place in everyone's hearts.  That isn't to say Shanks didn't have his moments, and considering who voiced him, it's not surprising he was able to adequately serve as Murphy's replacement.

One of the defining features of Captain Shanks is his thick southern accent,

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which he drops towards the end of season 4, claiming that people were thinking he was gay.

A defining thing that separated Shanks from his predecessor was Shanks' relationship with the crew.  Although Murphy and Shanks ended up having similar command qualities, Shanks was less frequently seen going off on independent ventures, unlike Murphy who would trap himself under soda machines or take up ridiculous endeavors at an almost whimsical pace.

Shanks is a former football coach, and this trait is referenced several times.  When he tries to assemble a football team on Sealab, he understandably picks Debbie to be the head cheerleader, but when his attempt to recruit Quinn as the QB fails, he is surprised, in a rather painful way by her throwing arm, that Debbie Love desires to be quarterback.  He runs the old box offense, much to the chagrin of Debbie Love.

Excellent Quotes:

"I just got one thing to say...you don't like me?  Fine...go watch Anee-may"

"Now, are you in, or does miniature John Wilkes Booth have to shoot you in the face about a billion more times?"

[Iandstander]

Derek "Stormy" Waters

Sealab's Science Officer (post brain switch) Voiced by:  Ellis Henican  Ellis Henican Discussion Thread Also thinks Marco is a "mailbox head", but Murphy sees through his act.

If you recall the perilous times during the episode 7211, Stormy is the cool headed leader of the liaison team sent to survey the damage sustained to the Aquarius, a submarine that drove straight into the seamount.  With cool headed determination and quick thinking, Stormy displayed outstanding leadership and competency as he began organizing the recovery effort with the Captain of the Aquarius.

This, however, is not normal stormy, and normal stormy is probably the least competent person on sealab, and given the crew that's saying something.  He's frequently the guy who takes things either too far, or does them incorrectly, such as in the episode 'I, Robot', where he

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cuts open his own skull in preparation for a brain transplant

even in the Bizzaro sense,

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like when his bizzaro copy ends up killing himself.

Stormy's a nice guy, though.  For all those philosophy and logic majors out there, check him out as a man in a cave, where he's trapped with Quinn.  

Excellent Quotes:

"What's the deal with black dudes and turtlenecks?"

"I gotta have that dick!"

"Does Ed Harris... pay you to be a bitch?"

"I'm Stormy" 

"White Debbie? That's stupid, I know she's white!"

 (to tourists) "All aboard, sheeple!"

[Iandstander]

Dr. Quentin Quinn

Quinn Voiced by: Brett Butler , who now performs with a comedy troupe Brett Butler Conversation...talk about, with, or at him Has 5, Count em, 5...Ph.D's

Dr. Quinn is the rational exception to the eccentricism that rampantly storms across the sealab facility.  His advanced intellect and blunt common sense counters, albeit unsuccessfully in most cases, the manic and unruly nature of the rest of the crew.  He finds a certain solace, however, in his own personal brand of insanity, often via sex, frequently with Debbie Dupree, who is regularly considered to be his 'romantic partner'...if you could possibly consider anything they do together romantic.  

Quinn is unusually responsible, given the crew he's with.  When a spaceship robot's looking to destroy Sealab and there's narry a captain to be found, Quinn mans up and takes one for the team. When all else fails, he'll be there to step up and make a decision or act quickly to do what needs to be done.  That being said, he's also one to just give up and say 'I don't give a damn go about your damn way" (paraphrased, not quoted).  For example

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He's ridden an atomic bomb in after Sealab was destroyed by future Kennedy, he's built robot bodies so Debbie won't find out about Chubby Carol, he's built a monster truck with Shanks at the bottom of the sea, etc...

Excellent Quotes:

"My eye! What did you do to my eye?!"

"MISTAKES....WERE MADE" 

Also, 

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Is actually a cyborg, as revealed in the episode "I, Robot".  

[Iandstander]

Jodene Sparks

Sealab's Radio Control Engineer Knows a great hookup for Stimutac Voiced by:  Bill Lobley Enjoys always sitting

 Most commonly seen manning the console, and always in the seated position, is Jodene Sparks. He takes a pseudo-laissez-faire attitude towards much of the goings on in Sealab, and often schemes and plans his own devices opposed to dutifully manning his post.  Some of the shady deals he has found himself involved in include selling scuba tanks to an irishman in "No Waterworld", the creation of his own army (with Marco as his top henchman), and the ever popular stimutacs.  

There's some speculation as to whether Sparks just enjoys sitting constantly or is crippled.  

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Debbie tested this theory when Sparks claimed to be crippled by repeatedly stabbing him in the legs with sharp objects, and despite the pain, Sparks resisted the urge to give in and admit he felt anything

Excellent Quotes:

(at Dolphin Boy) "That's right, fat stuff! Shake those chins!"

"It's like livin' in a fat guy's pants in here."

[Iandstander]

Debbie Dupree 

Debbie Voiced by:  Kate Miller (who's also involved with Frisky Dingo) Has a very tempermental biological clock Moustache Off

Debbie, also known as "White Debbie" to the perplexion of Stormy (Stormy: "I know she's white")...is the primary female protagonist on Sealab.  She's known for her promiscuity, particularly with Quinn.  As one of two reccuring female characters, it gets lonely at the bottom of the sea, and as such, she screams sexuality in a lot of her actions.  Of her non-sexual traits, she is fairly argumentative, and shies away from nothing, and usually will only concede out of frustration and apathy.  She doesn't like taking #### from anybody, and will go to irrational ends sometimes.  Referenced many times in the show, an entire episode towards the end of the series' run emphasized this point repeatedly.  The episode "No Waterworld" found Debbie repeatedly snubbed by Shanks and Quinn because 'men were talking', and 

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that ultimately led to the men being distracted by their monster truck while she went to seek out the real reason the water receded.  She finds the aliens, and then has a prolific scientific moment

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which is ruined when it turns out the aliens just wanted to touch her breasts.

All those things aside, Debbie is a kind, caring individual, and cares a lot for the sealife and the children of sealab.  In one episode, she threatens to blow herself up to prevent the others from killings a sick whale.  And generally, aside from the mandatory dolphin boy hate, she is one of the advocates for the children...which are on sealab for some reason, I don't exactly know why...but they are...

Excellent Quotes:

Debbie: "If you kill this semi-intelligent creature...I'll blow us all to hell!"

Whale:  "Man, this is gonna be great!"

(singing) "We don't drink and we don't smoke! Norfolk! Norfolk!"

[Iandstander]

Debbie Love 

Other Debbie Voiced by:  Angela Gibbs Sealab's School Teacher

Debbie Love is a proud black woman, and is taken aback as being referred to as the other Debbie.  Don't let her work with the children fool you, aside from having very vocal opinions, she also has strong feelings towards not caring what other people think, or about what happens in general as long as she gets hers. She appears in far fewer episodes than the other Debbie, but as one of two permanent female characters, stands out for her sexual sway over other crew members.  In addition to that, she's also very physical.  When Shanks attempts to form a football team on Sealab, he's surprised  

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in the form of a football to the gut

 of Debbie's abilities as a quarterback.  She belittles Shanks for his outdates formations.

Debbie also serves as a lecture proctor for the tourists, but tricks them into making souvenirs.  

Excellent Quotes:

[Iandstander]

Marco 

Marco Is considered to be a "Mailbox head" and is featured on the "I hate Marco" show Is Sparks' top henchman Voiced by: Erik Estrada Has the most excellent panic face

Also known as 'Senor Clown!" in the episode where sealab becomes a tourist attraction.

Excellent Quotes: 

(to Black Debbie) "Sounds like you need a shot of Vitamin 'M.' "

"Cinn-A-Mon! Cinn-A-Mon!"

Kid: "Señor Clown... I want my mommy!"

Marco: "Hey hey hey! Señor Clown wants your mommy too kid..." (laughs) ".... SHUT UP!"

[Iandstander]

Hesh Hepplewhite

Hesh The uncool guy who tries to ruin it for everyone Voiced by:  MC Chris Wants some sex.

Hesh is the outcast of sealab, well..one of them.  It's arguable that none of the characters would fit into a rational society of people, but amongst the poor behavior throughout the lab, Hesh has his special blend of obnoxious.  Some would say he has sort of a Napoleonic complex, feeling excluded and underinfluential in the core group of characters, so he makes up for it by constantly talking himself up.  Frequently, he'll refer to himself in the third person, attempting to draw the conversation to himself.  

Hesh is rather argumentative, too, and frequently finds himself in positions opposite where the rest of the crew would be.  He was one of the first 

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to openly declare that he would side with the humans because he couldn't get the right type of robot body.

Excellent Quotes:

"Hesh wants married sex" 

"God, damnit! That was my last arm!"

"Hesh wants jalapeño poppers!

[Iandstander]

Dr. Virjay

Sealab's Doctor Voiced by:   Will cut you up under the sea

Despite probably taking the hippocratic oath at some point, Dr. Virgay is usually more or less apathetic towards the feelings or suffering of his patients.  His 'I don't give a ####' attitude towards most things probably stems from few people, if any, taking him overly serious on Sealab, since his role is relatively minor.  He has played a pivotal role in saving the lives of many of the crewmembers, including Quinn during 'brainswitch' and Murphy from squishface.  

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The squishface treatment was ultimately undone when it turned out that murphy's bandage was actually Squishface...and he was torched again.

Excellent Quotes:

Quinn:  "I don't want to let him suffer...but can I intentionally end a life?"

Virjay: "I'll kill him right now.  Say I won't. Say it"

(to Debbie) "Well I know what the brain is made of..." (mumbles) "you stupid bitch."

(to tourist) "Woman there's no time! Get your fat ass out of here!"

kid: "Do you know where my mommy is?"

Virjay: "Who am I, the Rockford Files?"

[Iandstander]

Chopper Dave

Chopper Dave First Episode Appearance: I, Robot Has a made for TV movie, "Blades of Vengeance" Voiced by:   Graduate of the United States Sealab Academy Class of 2017 (i think)

 Look!  Up in the sky!  It's a bird!  It's a plane!  It's a qualified aviator!  No! It's Chopper Dave!  Hey-OH!  

That's his catch-phrase..."Hey-oh!"

Chopper Dave appears in the made-for-tv movie Blades of Vengeance, where he is a chopper pilot by day, and at night

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fights crime as a werewolf

He's on the news team, where he obviously pilots the chopper.  I mean...come on, what did you think he did?

Excellent Quotes:

"Uh Oh"

[Iandstander]

Dolphin Boy

Dolphin Boy First Episode Appearance: Voiced by:   Hates Whales

Dolphin Boy, although a cute little bundle of fun on Sealab, is characterized as being played by two twins who Virgay hormonally treats to keep their young age.  Dolphin Boy the character is surprisingly intolerant of the Whale race.

dolphin noises

[Iandstander]

Frenchman

Happycake Oven Recovery Team Member First Episode Appearance: Happycake Voiced by:  Somebody Ze squid

 Though our time with him was brief, the frenchman provided us with that barely understandable mumble that was the subtitled french narration of the giant squid as they searched desperately for the happycake oven.

[Iandstander]

Sharko

Stormy First Episode Apperance Adult Swim Brain Trust Knows Shark Karate Last Episode Apperance:  Voiced by:   Sharko Polo

Sharko

Excellent Quotes:

Spoilers:  

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spoilt

[Majikthise]

For Sharko's first appearance, you might want to mention the "Anime Talk Show" that he was in before his debut on the show.

[Iandstander]

Squishface

Squishface

Squishface makes his first appearance when a shady street cart vendor peddling her wares fails to spark Murphy's interest until the magical lump of joy catches his eye.  Charmed by the cute face, Murphy instantly becomes infatuated with squishface, much to the chagrin of the crew.  Squishface emits a foul odor, and when mixed with alcohol, has a tendency to multiply uncontrollably.

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The crew ultimately resolves teh squishface situation with an ultimate showdown involving flame throwers.  Murphy builds a giant robot out of squishfaces, but is ultimately defeated due to squishface being much like marshmallow when set on fire.  Sneakily, Squishface disguises himself as a bandage...but is eventually caught...and torched again.

[Iandstander]

Ben 

Sealab's Scorpion   Voiced by:   You need exact change

Ben the scorpion makes acquaintances with Captain Murphy after an unfortunate incident with a Bebop Cola machine.  At first, Captain Murphy is hesitant about forming their friendship, which is understandable considering all Ben does is sting Murphy with is venom.  The venom that courses through his veins and ruins what little is left of his mind while the crew absentmindedly takes to the road and leaves him trapped.  Their relationship grows to more than just a man vs. scorpion scenario, as eventually Ben and Murphy come to a mutual understanding, and in his weakened state, Murphy is relieved of some of the anxiety from Ben's gentle and caring touch, whether it be by puncturing a can of cola to quench his thirst, or providing 'the good stuff' that Murphy no longer wants, but instead needs.....

Awesome Quotes

Spoilers

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Ben is eventually killed by a robot, which pisses the hell out of Murphy. 

[Iandstander]

Toni Carmel

Nighttime Entertainment Television Host Hosts and Narrates the 'behind the scenes' of Sealab Voiced by:

 Toni makes 3 appearances, and in those three appearances, gives us exclusive access to the lives of the characters who are the actors who play the characters...or something like that.  She hosts the finale, 'A Legacy of Laughter', where the crew reflects on 4 years of excellent television.  

[Iandstander]

Contributors: Team Helper